I'm Not Stupid, YOU ARE!

One thing that never ceases to amaze me as a blogger, is the amount of support I receive.  From total strangers.  People read what I have to say, and then will post fantastic comments or send me awesome emails wishing me well, providing some good advice, and/or just wanting to tell me that they read what I had to say and they liked it.

After three years, it has never stopped being surprising and totally awesome.

But, occasionally, I do get an email or comment that isn't supportive.  It isn't even constructive criticism.  It's downright mean and hateful.

Thankfully, over the years, the amount of nasty emails and comments are only a minuscule percentage compared to the good ones.

If a comment is negative, but said in a nice way... I'll publish it.  I don't mind being condoned for some of my practices or disagreed with.  Everyone has their right to an opinion, and I'm not going to pick and choose to only publish the opinions that agree with mine.

I refuse, however, to publish comments that are just right mean and nasty.  That I won't do.  I'll delete them and go about my merry way as if the comment was never there in the first place.  No one has to know - that's why I moderate my comments.  It's my choice to publish them or not...and I won't if someone wants to sit on their side of the computer and just spurt out nasty things about me.

Unless, of course, I chose to write an entire blog post about it...

Which is what I'm going to do today.

This morning, I had a comment waiting to be reviewed.  I went to it and started reading.

First line:  YOU'RE STUPID!

Well...surely this comment was worthy of a full read.  I sit on the edge of my seat after seeing that line in caps, as well as the entire comment. This one is going to be a doozy, I knew it.

Full comment:

YOU'RE STUPID!

I HAVE NEVER READ A MORE STUPID EXCUSE FOR A BLOG THAN THIS ONE.  WHY ARE YOU EVEN WASTING YOUR TIME AND THE TIME OF YOUR READERS BY POSTING SUCH GARBAGE?  IT'S NO SURPRISING YOU'RE STILL FAT IF THIS IS WHAT YOU'RE SPEWING OUT EVERY DAY.  THE TRASH THAT YOU ARE STUFFING IN TO YOUR MOUTH EVERY DAY IS COMING OUT IN YOUR WORDS.  WHO EVEN READS THIS S**T?  ANYONE THAT WASTES THEIR TIME COMING HERE MUST BE JUST AS STUPID AND IGNORANT AS YOU ARE.  PLEASE DON'T CALL YOURSELF A BLOGGER, BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT.  YOU'RE JUST F**KING STUPID.  

THERE'S NO CHANCE YOU WILL EVER LOSE WEIGHT BECAUSE YOU DO NOTHING BUT WHINE AND CRY ABOUT NOT BEING ABLE TO LOSE WEIGHT.  HOW ABOUT YOU STOP EATING?  HOW ABOUT YOU START EXERCISING?  HOW ABOUT YOU QUIT MAKING UP LAME A** EXCUSES AND ACTUALLY DO IT?  BUT DON'T BLOG ABOUT IT.  THAT'S JUST DEPRESSING AND WORTHLESS.  IT WOULDN'T SURPRISE ME IF YOU SIT THERE EVERY DAY WRITING WHILE YOU'RE STUFFING YOUR FACE WITH CUPCAKES AND COOKIES.  

DO US ALL A FAVOR "FAT WOMAN", GO EAT ANOTHER CUPCAKE AND LEAVE THE BLOGGING TO PEOPLE THAT ACTUALLY KNOW WHAT THE HELL THEY ARE TALKING ABOUT.  

And, surprise, surprise... the sender of this wonderful comment?  Anonymous.

Figures.

My first reaction was to just delete it and move on.  Then, I thought that maybe I should publish it.  I suppose it's a valid opinion...even if it is a little harsh.  But, I decided to have a go at it head on... I could be the bigger person and just ignore it... but why be a bigger person?  That's something I'm trying not to be.  

Instead, I copied and pasted it here for you guys to see.  And then I went through and fixed all the red squiggly lines that appeared on my page.  My OCD just wouldn't allow for me to leave the atrocious spelling... it had to be fixed.  Surely, someone that starts out by calling me stupid could at least spell "excuse" right... but it was spelt "exscuse".  Just looking at the red line I'm now leaving behind is driving me nuts.

But, bad spelling aside, the comment hurt.  Pretty bad.  I know that there are people out there that may stumble across my blog and have those feelings.  I've even said it about myself sometimes... that I'm probably stupid for doing some of the things I do or saying some of the things I say.  But, I can say those things about myself - it's just not OK for someone else to say them about me.

So, I'm going to do what I want to do...respond.  Gloves off.  Professionalism aside.  And hopefully, my anonymous "friend" comes back to see if I published his/her comment and responded.

Dear Anonymous,

I'm not stupid, you are!  

If my blog is so bad, why on earth are you reading it?  I'm not sure if you know this or not, but there's a few buttons on the mouse that's connected to your computer that will help with the problem you're having.  Don't like it?  DON'T FREAKIN' READ IT!  There.  Simple.

While I'm sure that you are the head of the Blog Readers of the World, and anyone that ever reads blogs has designated you as the their one and only voice to speak for them...I don't write my blog for anyone else.  I write it for myself.  

I honestly don't give a rat's behind what you think of my blog, of me, or what I have to say.  I've never declared myself as a "professional blogger" or even worthy of anyone choosing to read my blog.  I'm honored and humbled by the fact that people do read what I have to say.  But, even if I wrote my blog every day and not a single person ever read it... I'd still keep doing it.  It's for me.  Not for dumb asses like you!

I would have written this response back to you, personally... but you forgot to leave your name.  

How about next time, you crawl out from behind that little space you're hiding in and have the balls to at least share who you are?

Better yet.  Don't.  

Just reading back over that makes me cringe.  Why am I even giving this person the time of day?  

But, you know what?  I am sick and tired of people that just can't move on and pretend they've never even seen my blog if they hate it so bad.  Why on earth does someone feel the need to express such nastiness to a complete stranger?

I've read many blog posts that I disagreed with or I thought were terrible.  But, do you know what I do when that happens?  I close out the page and move on.  I would never in a million years think about leaving a nasty comment if I disagreed or didn't like what I read.  I hold the power as to whether or not I read something.  No one puts a gun to my head.  No one forces me to read anything I don't want to read.  

I know there are days when what I write isn't all that great.  There are days when I don't get a single comment...many days in a row, actually.  But, I chalk it up to people being busy, not wanting to comment, or not liking what I have to say.  The silence is received - no offense taken, no worries about it.  Those that didn't like it moved on...no big deal.

It just boils my britches, and saddens me, that there are people out there that just can't do that.  They have to make their voice known - even if it's a nasty, hatred filled voice.  What's the point?  Most of the time the hatred will go unseen... because I delete it.  It was a waste of time.  I read it, I laughed, I deleted, I moved on.  Then who's the stupid one for spending their time doing that?

I probably shouldn't give this commenter the time of day..and I'm probably just falling in to the trap of doing exactly what he or she wanted me to do.  And I'll except my weakness for that.  But, I still think it's worthy to retaliate my own thoughts.

So, if anyone reading my blog hates what I have to say, or disagrees with it, or wants to stab their eyeballs out.  Please.  Do me a favor...see that little "X" at the top of the screen?  Hit that.  And all of your problems will disappear in the blink of an eye.

OK.  Enough from me.  

I'm out.

Till next time!

Joanna

a/k/a Mad, Fat Woman